And if you ask me, I have experienced this behaviour since I was a child.
As a kid I was shy and wished to do what my friends did. But in order to do so I needed right set of perfect circumstances. Unfortunately or Fortunately, things did not happen the way I wished them to be. While my friends had an automatic compass box, I settled down with a normal one, while other friends went to hill stations with their families in vacations, I used to be at home getting bored, while my friends in school used to throw birthday party (parents organize it) at amusement parks or hotels every year, I used to celebrate my birthday once in 3-4 years by calling my friends at home. So, at every stage of Life, there had been a compromise on my primary goal, however small that goal may be. This led me to believe in the fact that I need to adjust and have expectations as per my potential & capacity.
As I grew up, I wished to become a Heart Surgeon and in pursuit of that dream I slogged, studied day in and day out but unfortunately when the moment came, I just had marks but no money due to circumstances around. Again a Goal was compromised and in hope of better tomorrow, I took up engineering as I had no other option in front of me then. This Goal compromise was a major setback in my life and it impacted my life at engineering too.
But then I realized that somethings thats gone cant be brought back and in regret of that I keep worrying on it, it will just make my life worst from worse. So, then deep within me an awakening took place which made me form a (Substitute) Goal; of being the best in what I do in Engineering. Knowing that what Goal Failure means, always helped me to get back my lost focus, lost concentration and lost energy in order to achieve the new goal that I set for myself. I never looked back since then on my academics. But again, Engineering ke bhi kuch apne hi funde hote hai, academics toh thik hai but to be unique from the crowd, U need to do something extra and that something extra was an opportunity with CSI and being a part of it. With the help of lovely friends, that happened too and gave my life a new meaning.
During the same time, a new Goal was born, I may call it a primary one in relation to my new life, to be an MBA from one of the IIMs. I did all that I could do to be there but I failed, took up a job to support a living and tried again, failed again. As pressures form environment increased, I succumbed to it and compromised on that primary Goal. This time the compromise was a less harsh as I had been a failure in 50% of it and that was no admit to IIMs, while I still managed to go to a B-School. Though I have no regrets for being in WE School, but an experience in IIMs would have been different altogether.
22nd September 2008, a new (Substitute) goal was born, to be recruited by A C Nielsen Bases. And again knowing what a failure means; my belief, my focus, my concentration and all my actions strengthened towards achieving that. And as life may have it in store, 14th October 2009, they came for campus recruitment, 28th October 2009 they interviewed me and 14th November 2009, I hear the news that I have achieved it. It was a dream come true experience.
Now, if I look at my life, I always failed to achieve my primary goals while the failures led me to achieve my substitute goals. And this has led me to think that what will happen to my next primary goal to become an Entrepreneur? Will it die like my other primary goals or will it be achieved? Will Life again decide what I should get or Will I be the one dictating terms this time?
I have these questions in mind but having gone through so much in last 20 years or so, I have realised one thing for sure that If I think it will happen, it will surely happen. So, today am erasing those questions from my mind by completely forgetting primary - substitute goal relationship in my life and focus all my efforts towards achieving my next primary goal of being an Entrepreneur.
It will now not depend on how life takes me, it will be other way round this time. I can & I will. Lets see !!!
